


Gods and Monsters

by Psychic101



Category: Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Claire and Brianna through the stones, F/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:08:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29069322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Psychic101/pseuds/Psychic101
Summary: The year is 1954 and while in Paris on vacation Claire takes Brianna to visit Faith's grave where an old friend from Claire's past makes an almost impossible appearance and shatters Claire's world– Jamie survived Culloden. Armed with the newfound information, Claire decides it's time to go home to Lallybroch, home to Jamie, and she's taking their daughter with her.The story of Claire and Brianna going back through the stones fourteen years earlier than canon.Named for Lana Del Rey's "Gods and Monsters"
Relationships: Claire Beauchamp/Brianna Randall Fraser MacKenzie, Claire Beauchamp/Frank Randall, Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser, Fergus Fraser/Jamie Fraser, Jamie Fraser/Brianna Randall Fraser MacKenzie, Jenny Fraser/Ian Murray
Comments: 105
Kudos: 254





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been working on this idea for months, it was originally supposed to be the second part for "I Came, I Saw, I Conquered" but I thought it would work better on its own. The story will stay as canon compliant as it can with Claire and Brianna going back so early for the first few chapters before branching off to a story of my own making. I really hope you guys enjoy this, stay safe out there!

**Paris: 1954**

“Mama, look!” Brianna said, peering out the circular frame as she pressed her face against the glass. They’d begun their descent fifteen-minutes prior, the city of Paris growing beneath them as they slowly dove towards the earth. Brianna bounced excitedly in her seat, pointing at the Eiffel Tower looming in the distance. Claire hoped she’d be able to see it; through her many visits–and shortly lived– time in Paris, Claire had never once been able to visit the magnificent landmark, the third time’s the charm if the mantra proved correct.   


" Isn’t it beautiful?” Brianna asked, leaning closer against the glass. 

" Yes, lovey, it really is,” Claire responded. 

“Bree, darling, not so close,” Frank said, reaching across Claire to gently peel Brianna away from the window, “We’ll have plenty of time to see it in person, I promise.” 

Brianna settled into her seat, resting her back against the chair, she let out a wistful sigh before turning to Frank, “Pinky promise?” Brianna asked, holding up her pinky towards Frank.

" Of course!”

Claire leaned into the cushion of the seat as much as she could as Frank and Brianna linked their pinkies in front of her middle, both smiling as if Frank had just promised her the world. He might as well have, Claire reasoned. Brianna was five-years-old and after many years of failed promises of a vacation, the Randalls were finally doing it– the vacation coinciding with Frank’s business trip was just a lucky coincidence. 

Claire had been excited when Frank announced their trip, she was stressed from medical school and was happy for the break. The happiness had been brief, however, when Frank revealed their location. Paris France was the last place Claire wanted to be, hell, she’d rather visit the decrepit Lallybroch Farm before stepping foot in Paris, but Frank had turned the tables by telling Brianna first. By the time Claire was aware of their trip, Brianna’s head was already full of ideas of their perfect getaway and the streets of Paris she’d glimpsed from movies. Brianna was happy and Clarie couldn’t bring herself to crush the little girl, even if it meant enduring the painful memories. 

Jamie weighed heavily on her mind, he always did, but as the wheels of the plane landed on the tarmac all Claire thought about was their daughter, Faith. Faith hadn’t been lucky enough to leave Paris or the hospital where she’d arrived into the world dead, the older Brianna grew the more Claire wondered what Faith would be like. She would have looked like her father and sister, no doubt, she was born with the tell-tale Fraser red hair and cat eyes, but what would her personality be? Would she be as stubborn as her father? A bibliophile like her great-uncle? Or perhaps a doctor like her mother.

Claire watched from behind the pair as Frank held tightly onto Brianna’s small hand with his own as they climbed down the stairs onto the black pavement. He pointed out the very building Claire and Brianna were eager to see, even from across the city it seemed gigantic. Brianna hung onto Frank’s every word of its construction as they walked across the tarmac towards the terminal. The closer they got to the security check-point the more Brianna bounced with glee, she wasn’t as tired as Claire had been expecting, but then again, she’d slept through the majority of the flight.

Customs and security waved them through quickly, traveling with a child had its perks, and after an hour of their landing, they had their luggage and were in a taxi on the way to their hotel. Frank was still talking excitedly to Brianna leaving Claire alone with her thoughts.

Before leaving Paris with their hearts broken in two and no idea what the future held, Claire had made Jamie promise her that they would never step foot in Paris again. The city held too much loss, Jamie had quickly agreed. Yet here she was, two-hundred and some odd years in the future and she was back, haunted by the memories. As they drove past the harbor, in combination with the darkening skies, Claire could all but see the flaming  _ Patagonia _ in the distance. Claire briefly wondered what had become of Jared’s business and estate, he didn’t have any children unless he’d fathered one after their departure, however, she thought this unlikely. It had probably been sold or dissolved with time. 

They pulled up to the hotel, Frank guiding Brianna out of the taxi before turning and offering her a hand of assistance, she accepted, but only because of the large puddle near the door.

Frank–and Harvard– were apparently sparing no expense, the hotel’s lobby was extravagant, easily on par with King Louis’s palace. They were escorted by the hotel’s staff to the top floor of the hotel.

“The best view in the entire city!” Their attendant chirped as they stepped foot into the room. Brianna dropped Frank’s hand and made a beeline for the beds while Frank dismissed the staff and Claire looked out the window. Their view was breathtaking. 

“Brianna Ellen!” Claire scolded, turning to face the five-year-old jumping on the bed.

“Oh, let her,” Frank said, walking to stand next to the foot of the bed. “We’re on vacation after all!” Brianna leaped from the mattress into Frank’s waiting arms. 

Of course, he was playing good cop. Probably buttering Brianna up for the next few days Claire was sure he would spend working instead of enjoying their  _ family  _ vacation. 

They ordered room service, the adults were jetlagged while Brianna was bouncing off the walls with uncontained joy, there’s no way they could sit through a meal in a restaurant. After dinner was bath time, Brianna, much like her father, loved her baths. She splashed in the water happily as Claire mentally ran through the itinerary she had planned for the next day. They would wake up early, have breakfast with Frank before visiting the spots she’d once been familiar with: Jared’s estate, Louise’s house, Master Raymond’s shop, and L'Hôpital des Anges were all on her list. 

Frank had pulled a sly move, booking them a room with only two beds, forcing her to sleep in the same bed as him. It backfired, however, when Brianna crawled into their bed not long after she’d settled, too afraid to sleep on her own in a strange city. Claire slept fitfully due to Frank’s snoring, Brianna’s constant kicking, and her wandering mind. Her dreams were filled with memories of the ones she’d lost, they were mostly of Jamie with Fergus and Murtagh tied for second. The older Brianna got the more vivid and realistic they seemed to become. Claire often woke expecting to find a slumbering giant next to her only to get slammed down to reality. 

Claire was on her third cup of coffee by the time Frank excused himself to run some ‘errands’. Errands that would last the entire day as he’d bid them farewell with the promise of catching up over dinner. Claire bundled Brianna in her coat and together they explored the city. Brianna was thankfully much too young to notice that their destinations were clearly planned and meaningful. She missed the light tears trailing down Claire’s cheek as they stood on the land that once held Louise de la Tour and her family in favor of a passing bird flying over their heads. 

Despite being brought down by the past, Claire was determined to make this the best trip possible for Brianna. The little girl was spoiled with French chocolate and various other candies as well as a new dress Brianna had picked out herself. It was there that she saw him, or thought she did. They were walking out of the beautique, Brianna holding her new dress to her chest while Claire did her best to stuff her wallet back into her bag. Brianna dropped the dress and Claire swiftly went to catch it before the ensuing meltdown when she caught sight of the familiar face. 

A man no taller than four feet with a high forehead partially covered by long silvery-grey hair with black eyes to match. 

She blinked once in shock, prepared to call out, but when her eyes opened again he was gone. Just a mirage, Claire reasoned. They’d been moving around all day, she was tired, dehydrated, and hungry. No wonder her mind was playing tricks on her, conjuring up the image of the man surrounded in blue. 

They returned to the hotel where the night was the same as the last.

This time, the frog-man she’d once known as her friend consumed her dreams. She was back in the dark damp hospital bed in L'Hôpital des Anges, truly alone and dying. Her body ached with the physical toll of losing Faith while her mind languished in the agony of her losses. Then he came before her, cloaked with darkness and a healing pulse to save her life. Claire could feel Raymond’s calloused hands as they trailed over her womb before going between her legs and reaching inside, dragging death from her.

She awoke in a cold sweat. 

Frank snored blissfully beside her while Brianna hugged her stuffed rabbit to her chest, both completely absorbed in imaginary worlds. She didn't go back to sleep, Claire knew trying would be fruitless, so instead, she dressed and went for a walk down the harbor. The putrid smell of salt and fish had not dissipated in the two centuries she’d been gone. She missed the small room she and Jamie had rented before moving in with Jared, it was small and homely, she saw him every night. She’d take that small room versus the large empty one of the hotel she was currently in. Still, she couldn’t fault Frank for trying to impress her. He was doing his best, or the best he thought he was capable of. 

Claire was back by breakfast, Frank was finishing his tea and Brianna poked at the vanilla crepes on her plate. 

“Have a nice walk?” Frank asked, tilting down the newspaper to look at her.

“I did,” Claire nodded, placing her hand on the top of Brianna’s flaming hair. “Cleared my senses right up, I’ve been a bit off lately.”

“Yes, I’ve noticed,” Frank agreed, turning back to the paper in his hand.

“Do you want my breakfast, Mama?” Brianna asked, holding up her fork towards her mother. “I wanted pancakes, but Daddy said these were better.” 

“You need to broaden your horizons, darling, you can’t live off Sugar Smacks and peanut butter jelly sandwiches forever,” Frank told her.

“Yes, I can…” Brianna murmured, turning back to her plate. 

“How about I take a shower and then we’ll go exploring? That always cheers you up Bree,” Claire suggested, taking off her coat and hanging it on a hook by the door. She walked into the bedroom and began undressing, not noticing that Frank had followed her until the door clicked shut behind him.

“Where are you planning on going today? Eiffel Tower? The Louvre?” he eyed her, leaning against the doorway as she started preparing her bath.

“No actually,” Claire said, glancing at him, “There’s a hospital, L'Hôpital des Anges, not far from here, opened up during the 1700s, I thought Brianna would like to see the architecture.”

Frank frowned, “You’ve never been there before, have you?” 

Frank had little knowledge of her time through the stones. He knew about Jamie and their failed attempt to stop Culloden, but she as far as she could remember she’d only briefly mentioned their doings in Paris; meeting with King Louis and Charles Stuart, she’d mentioned nothing of her time working in the hospital.

" No,” Claire said, turning to focus on her bath. “Why?”

“Well, it’s not a hospital anymore,” Frank said, straightening himself. “It’s a church, I didn’t even know you knew about it. It’s quite interesting…” 

“Oh, uh, a friend told me a bit while I was here during the war. It was a triage site and she knew the history of the place, told it as an anecdote. Fun fact if you will.” Claire lied, making sure to keep her face away from Frank so he couldn’t read her. Her answer seemed to appease him as he said nothing else and instead left the room, leaving her to enjoy her bath. 

Before long Claire was holding Brianna’s hand tightly as they walked through the doors of what used to be L'Hôpital des Anges and what was now St. Bartholomew’s Church. The cots that had once filled the rooms had long been replaced with pews and burning candles. The ambiance was still the same, Claire could picture Mother Hildegarde plowing through the room with Bouton at her heels. The memory made her smile. 

“What is this place, Mama?” Brianna asked, stopping to look at one of the colored glass windows.

“It’s a church, Bree, but it used to be a hospital.” Claire gently tugged on Brianna’s hand to get her to move. “I used to work here, you know,” Claire whispered, leading Brianna through the hall. 

“You did?” 

“Yes, I had many friends here, I saved lives. I lanced bunions and did surgeries–”

“You were a doctor!”

Claire chuckled, “Yes, I kind of was, though they thought I was just a witch.” 

“What was it like?” 

“It was crowded,” Claire began, “Over there,” she pointed to the area in front of them, “Is where the non-contiguous patients were housed and there,” she turned to the right, “Leads down to the basement below, where we kept the supplies and Mother Hildegarde had her room and office. She had a lovely piano down there and when she played, you could hear it all over.” 

“That’s so cool!” Brianna said smiling. 

Claire bit her lip, unsure if her next move was the right one, but they were here, and Claire couldn’t walk away. “There’s somebody I want you to meet, Bree.” Claire stood and tightened her grasp on Brianna’s hand as they walked through the small gathering of church-goers and out one of the back doors into the cemetery. They didn’t have to walk far, the hospital must have been converted not long after, they walked down the rows of decaying headstones until they came to the spot. 

Claire was surprised to find the marker almost as she’d left it. It was in surprisingly good condition considering the amount of time that had passed; the writing was legible and a small blue rose rested on the grey stone, even more shocking was the rusted spoon next to the rose’s stem.

“Faith Fraser,” Brianna read, “1744… is that when she was born?” she looked up at Claire.

“Yes,” Claire nodded, “Born and died, 1744, Brianna…” Claire choked on the words. “This is Faith,” she knelt to Brianna’s level and took both hands in her own, “Your sister.”

“My sister?” Brianna asked, looking from Claire to the stone. 

“I know you don’t understand darling or believe me but it's true. I know about this place because I was here back then, back in 1744. Faith was born in the hospital, the church, but she was already dead. I never got to meet her alive,” 

Brianna stayed silent, processing as well as a child could. 

“You’re true sisters, Faith, you have the same hair and eyes, the same as your father’s. You both look just like him.” 

“But Daddy doesn’t have red hair,”

“Not Daddy, Bree, his name is–was– Jamie.” 

“Is he here too? With my sister?” Brianna asked, looking around the surrounding area for any man with red hair. 

“No,” Claire said, bringing Brianna’s attention back to her, “Jamie… you’ll never get to meet him, I’m afraid, but he loved you so much. So much that he sent us back to daddy so we would be safe. He died a long time ago.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure, Madonna.” 

Claire turned towards the voice, it was so familiar, she had to be dreaming again, yet standing four feet away was the frog-man, Master Raymond. 

“Raymond?” Claire whispered. 

Raymond nodded once with a smile before saying, “He’s alive, Madonna, your husband is not lost in the past.” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to my beta albatross1013, truly amazing and I'm so thankful for the help and encouragement.

He was gone before she could speak.

A single blink and he disappeared like a puff of smoke. 

She was going crazy, that had to be the only explanation. How could he be there one second and gone the next? How could he be there at all? Even if her assumption of him being a traveler was correct, which made her head hurt more than it already did, it was impossible to explain how he knew to be there at this exact moment. The moment she told Brianna the truth of her heritage, secluded in a crowded space with Faith as proof.

It was simply mind-boggling. 

“Where did he go?” Brianna asked, spinning in a circle. “The man?” 

“You saw him?”

“Yes,” Brianna nodded, a slow frown spreading across her delicate face, “What does… Madonna mean, Mama? He called you that.” 

If Brianna saw him too then she wasn’t going crazy, Master Raymond had indeed just been there and shattered her entire world. Jamie was alive. Well, not alive since he’d been dead for the past two hundred years but he’d survived Culloden. How? He had been ready to die with his men but against all odds, Jamie survived when so many perished.

She suddenly wished she hadn’t given up her attempts of finding him after she’d come back for what was ultimately Frank’s sake, maybe if she had kept going she would have discovered Jamie’s survival sooner. Claire knew in her heart that if she knew his true fate she would have turned right back around and gone back to him. His survival changed their entire plan. He only sent her away because he was planning on dying; unable to take care of her and their child he sent them to someone who could, somewhere safe. But Claire always felt safe with Jamie. 

“Mama?” Brianna tugged on her sleeve, “Who was he?” 

“He was an old friend of mine, he knew your father and me back then,” Claire explained, finally placing all her attention on the little girl. 

“He knew Daddy?” 

“He knew Jamie,” Claire corrected. 

Maybe Brianna was too young for this after all, maybe Claire should have waited longer, the slanted blue eyes staring up at her in confusion echoed her thoughts. 

“C’mon lovey,” Hugging Brianna to her, Claire lifted her daughter and felt her toddler legs wrap tightly around her waist as she stood. 

Burying her nose in Brianna’s hair Claire took a deep breath and let herself rest, for only a moment, that was all she needed. Sparing one last look at Faith’s headstone, Claire turned and walked through the wrought-iron gates of the cemetery. 

Brianna was uncharacteristically silent on their journey back to the hotel, she stared straight into the back of the driver’s seat instead of out the window. When Claire’s offer of ice cream was ignored, she truly began to worry about Brianna. It was a lot to absorb, that Claire knew, but how much Brianna understood was unknown. 

Frank was the only father Brianna knew, the only father Claire expected for her to know for a long while; now, the little girl had a man she knew as a father and a father she knew only as a name.

It was clear from their very brief conversation that Brianna had already begun to interchange the two men, but that was to be expected.

It wasn’t until after they’d arrived back to the hotel, cuddling in bed for a mid-afternoon nap after a steaming, cleansing bath that Claire approached the subject. 

“Master Raymond, the frog man, called me Madonna because he sees me cloaked in blue, like Mary, Jesus’ mother.”

“That makes sense,” Brianna said, snuggling closer to Claire. “Mama… what was he like? My father?” she asked in a whisper. 

Claire smiled, “He was amazing, Bree. He loved me, he loved us so much. He was the bravest, biggest man I’d ever seen with such a kind heart– a gentle giant.” 

Brianna hummed as Claire stroked Brianna’s back as she described Jamie.

“He had red hair and blue eyes, just like you, he was pale–though not as pale as you and I– with large muscles. He loved horses, the outdoors and was quite the academic, he spoke five languages.” 

“Really?” Brianna looked up at Claire.

Claire nodded, pulling Brianna closer as the girl laid her head on Claire’s chest and quickly fell asleep, the excitement and confusion of the day finally catching up with her. 

“You’re so much like him…” Claire whispered, closing her eyes and kissing the top of Brianna’s head.

It was then that she knew. She knew what she had to do, knew what they had to do. They had to go back, back to Jamie. 

Claire carefully maneuvered out from underneath Brianna, resting her gently on the bed, and with pen and loose paper she began to plan. She started with a list of everything they would need for the journey: period-appropriate clothing, money, food to last them to Lallybroch and Brianna’s baby pictures. She listed the wants: medicine, needles, sterile bandages, and generally whatever she could get her hands on from the hospital without attracting too much attention. She would need to resign from the hospital, handle her financials, deal with Frank… Frank. 

Claire paused in her list-making. What was she going to do about Frank? 

Claire doubted that he would willingly let them go back, he’d fought so hard to keep the truth from Brianna and to force Claire from the memories of the past into the present, there was no way he would just let them go. Let Brianna go. He would do anything to keep them from going. 

The answer became clear when she went down to the hotel lobby to use the single, wall hanging landline to call Joe; an employee Claire recognized as the concierge approached her methodically, reaching out one of his hands to hand her a sealed envelope. 

“From your husband,” he simply said, letting her open the envelope and read its contents. He waited until it was clear that Claire had read the message inside in its entirety, her face dropping into a mix of anger and relief before adding, “He sounded apologetic if that helps at all, Madam.” 

“Thank you,” Claire told him, shoving the envelope into the clutch she’d brought down with her. 

She dismissed the concierge with a wave of her hand, not usually so short with staff but wanting to be left alone. She waited until the concierge was firmly out of earshot before turning the dial and ringing Joe’s line. 

“Hello?” Joe answered after a few rings, his voice hoarse with sleep. It would be just after six in Boston, Claire almost felt guilty for waking him.

“Joe? I’m so sorry to wake you but I need your help,” she said.

“Lady Jane?” his voice morphed from shock to concern, “What’s going on? Are you and Bree all right?” 

“We’re fine Joe but I need you to do something for me, and I need you to do it without asking a million questions, promise me.” 

“Of course, anything, what is it?” he answered without hesitation.

She took a deep breath, “I’m leaving Frank. I need you to go to our house and pack a few things and send them to an address in Scotland–”

“Whoa, whoa, LJ, slow down,” Joe said, taking a series of loud long breaths, “where is all this coming from? I thought you guys went to Paris to address your issues.” 

“You promised you wouldn’t ask,” Claire responded, glancing around the lobby to make sure no one was close enough to hear, “I just found out that Brianna’s father, her real father, is alive, in Scotland and I just… I have to go to him.” 

Joe went silent, if it wasn’t for the sound of his breaths coming through the phone Claire would’ve thought he hung up. Claire was in a similar state of shock, she had never verbalized Brianna’s true parentage to anyone besides Frank and Mrs. Graham; she felt exhilarated and nauseous with the admission. 

“I always thought there was something more to the story,” Joe said, breaking the silence and stupor, “I mean, LJ, the red hair is a direct giveaway.”

Claire smiled, “It’s her father’s, and her eyes– those are his too.” 

“You love this guy?” Joe asked.

“More than I’ve ever loved anything,” Claire answered, “I’ve been shattered since, well, since I thought he’d died but now that I know he’s alive, it’s like all the pieces are coming together again. I can’t ignore it anymore, knowing he’s out there.”

“I know what you mean, you have to go to him– should go to him if you feel as strongly as you sound. But what about Frank?”

“Fuck Frank,” Claire said before she could stop herself.

She could hear Joe’s laughter with the phone leveled at her chest. 

“I’ve been waiting a long time to hear you say that,” Joe said, still fighting the remnants of laughter, “I’ll do what you need, Lady Jane, always. Let me get a pad and pen so I can write down the address and what you want me to grab.” 

Claire felt more at ease when she walked through the door than she had since Raymond’s visit, things were slowly coming together. Joe would pack everything she requested and hopefully they’d arrive in Scotland within a month which gave Claire plenty of time to prepare for their one-way journey. 

Brianna slept as Claire quickly and quietly packed their belongings back into the suitcase. The note she’d received from the concierge stated that Frank wouldn’t be back for a couple of days, having gone on a last-minute overnight tour of several historical sights relating to the Bonnie Prince with his group of fellow historians. Despite being transcribed by an employee, Claire could read the excitement of his new adventure and the lack of regret for leaving his family at the last second. He’d tried to smooth it over by suggesting she shop to her heart’s content. 

Joke’s on him, Claire thought closing the suitcase. 

She would definitely be shopping, but not in Paris and not for modern fashions. 

She positioned the suitcase by the door for an easy exit, she walked over to the bed and gently shook Brianna’s shoulder.

“Bree?” Claire whispered. 

Brianna cuddled tighter into the blankets at Claire's voice and movements.

“Sweetheart? You have to get up.” 

This time, Brianna didn’t react at all. 

Claire sighed and wrapped her arms around Brianna’s small body, lifting her so her legs could wrap around Claire’s waist and her head to rest on her shoulder. Claire rubbed Brianna’s back as she carefully walked to the door, surveying the room for any belongings Claire may have missed. When she passed the small table Claire grabbed the blue booklet of Frank’s passport and shoved it into her purse. 

“Have fun in Paris, Frank,” Claire muttered, shutting the door behind them.

She accepted the offered help from a bellboy as she stepped out of the elevator with Brianna held tightly in her arms. The staff had changed, leaving no one to recognize her and no one to tell Frank of their departure. The young man, who couldn’t have been more than nineteen, flagged down a taxi and in moments her luggage was loaded, and the door was open and inviting. She gave the man a generous tip, sending him on his way with a smile and a quick adieu. 

“Where to, Madam?” the driver asked, glancing at her from the rearview mirror.

“Airport,” she said. 

Brianna finally began to stir as the taxi pulled away from the curb and down the street from the hotel.

“Mama?” she looked at Claire, her hair mussed from sleep and her eyes still weary. “Where are we going?” 

“We’re going to Scotland,” Claire told her with a smile.

Brianna simply nodded, accepting her mother’s answer from what Claire hoped was still the influence of sleep and not the build-up for a future meltdown. Brianna relaxed into her mother’s side as the taxi navigated the roads while Claire stared out the window. The Eiffel Tower faded in the distance the closer they got toward their destination and for the briefest of moments, Claire felt regret for missing yet another chance at seeing the monument.

The last she would ever have if things went the way she hoped. 

They arrived at the airport as the heat began to dissipate, Claire tugged her coat closer to her body as she walked through the airport doors with Brianna on one side and their luggage on the other. Having called earlier that afternoon Claire knew they would be arriving just in time to catch the last flight to Scotland for the day. She purchased their tickets and followed the instructions toward the appropriate gate, in just a few hours the first leg of their journey would be complete. 

The arrangements had already been made. They would fly from Paris to Inverness where Mrs. Graham would be waiting for them. The woman was as clairvoyant as ever, knowing the reason for Claire’s call before she’d spoken a single word. 

“Yer goin’ back then?” 

After Claire’s confirmation, the older woman had promised Claire and Brianna a warm and safe place for them to stay, safe from Frank, that is. Claire was sure that the moment Frank realized they’d gone and had not returned to the states, he would know exactly what Claire was trying to do. Thankfully, he would be set back by Claire’s last-minute decision to take his passport, leaving him virtually stuck in Paris until he could obtain another, a process which could take months. By the time he would manage to resolve the situation, Claire and Brianna would be long-gone. 

They boarded the plane without issue and within moments of take-off Brianna was once again asleep, Claire envied how the girl could fall asleep anywhere, another trait she inherited from Jamie.

Claire remembered the first few weeks after she’d gone through the stones, never comfortable in her sleeping quarters, only managing to fall asleep from pure exhaustion. When she’d finally gotten used to Castle Leoch and slept on a nightly basis, they’d gone on the road, throwing her circadian rhythm once more. Lallybroch had been the only place she’d truly felt comfortable enough to sleep through the first night, having Jamie by her side had made it much easier. 

They’d be together again, Claire realized. 

For the first time, Claire allowed the thought to truly sink in. They’d be reunited, the wife and child Jamie believed he had lost to time would be back. Their family would be whole and they would live together– die together once they’d reached old-age.

Claire couldn’t wait. 

They arrived in Inverness only a few hours after dusk, the chilly summer weather of Scotland was a wonderful break from the humid day in Paris. They breezed through security and by the time they’d collected their luggage, Brianna hanging onto Claire’s neck like an additional bag, Mrs. Graham was waiting for them with open arms and the biggest smile Claire had ever seen.

“Girls!” Mrs. Graham rushed forward, wrapping them both in a warming hug, “It’s so good to see ye again! Look at ye, darling girl,” she cupped Brianna’s supple cheek, “so bonnie. And that hair! Ye truly are a Scot!” 

Brianna smiled at the affectionate attention before digging her nose into Claire’s neck from embarrassment. 

“She’s so precious!” Mrs. Graham said, watching Brianna with a chuckle. “Oh come, leannan, there’s no need to be so shy.”

“Brianna,” Claire said, rubbing Brianna’s back, “it’s okay lovie, Mrs. Graham is a friend of mine, we’re going to stay with her.” 

“Right ye are!” Mrs. Graham agreed, “Let’s get these suitcases in the car and put some food into ye, ye’re too skinny!”

“Let me help,” Claire moved forward as Mrs. Graham began lifting their luggage into her waiting car.

“Nonsense,” Mrs. Graham dismissed her, “Ye take the child, I can handle this, besides, I’m almost done.”

Claire buckled Brianna into the backseat as Mrs. Graham loaded the last bag into the trunk. The two adults settled into the front seats as they began the half-hour drive to their destination. 

Mrs. Graham placed her hand over Claire’s which had settled into her lap. Giving her hand a slight squeeze, she asked, “Are ye excited?” 

“It’s a dream come true,” Claire responded honestly. 

“Ye’ll be home soon, my dear, soon ye’ll be where ye belong.”

Claire knew the older woman was right. Soon she’d be with Jamie and nothing would ever tear them apart. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took me longer to map out than I thought it would, hopefully, the next updates won't be so spread apart since I know exactly what's happening for the next four chapters. 
> 
> As always, thanks for reading and all your lovely comments! They make my day and I do take all your thoughts/suggestions into consideration so keep 'em coming. 
> 
> Stay safe!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to my beta albatross1013, truly amazing and I'm so thankful for the help and encouragement. You've truly been a huge mean of support to me– couldn't have done it without you!

Three weeks in Scotland and Claire had yet to find a single trace of Jamie. 

The day after Claire and Brianna had arrived, Claire went straight to Reverend Wakefield’s house, knowing he had the largest collection of volumes on Culloden and Scottish life from the eighteenth century. He’d been more helpful than Claire expected. There was fear that he would call Frank, the two being friends, but he’d done nothing of the sort. 

Over the past few years, Frank had been hounding the kind Reverend for information regarding a variety of subjects of the uprising and when the Reverend was unable to meet Frank’s requests, he was rewarded with hostility. The back-and-forth of kindness and impatience had continued for three years before the Reverend was left with no choice but to cut all ties with Frank, his toxicity becoming too much to bear. His requests for documents, mentions, or legends all revolved around a single Culloden soldier: James Fraser. 

Despite his multiple volumes and penchant for research, the Reverend had been unable to find any concrete record of Jamie besides a signed document sent out by Prince Charlie pledging support. There were mentions of several James Frasers through the uprising but it was almost impossible to pinpoint the correct one based on the context of the records. The British had neglected proper documentation in the days following Culloden, there was no way to know for certain what had happened to Jamie according to historical documents. 

But according to Raymond, Jamie had survived, and that was enough for Claire to continue the search, and with the Reverend’s books in her possession, she set up shop in Mrs. Graham’s living room. 

The Reverend had been right, there wasn’t a single mention of James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser anywhere: no death record, business holdings or marriage contracts, though Claire was grateful for the nonexistence of the latter. She even tried to find Fergus, hoping if she could find him then Jamie would pop-up in association but like his lord, Fergus was nowhere to be found. The only record she was able to find was the birth of Ian Fraser Murray in 1752, Ian and Jenny’s son no doubt. 

Jamie was a wanted traitor, Claire had to remind herself, he wouldn’t have wanted a record, it would have only led to his capture and inevitable death for treason. Hanging or firing squad, the Reverend had said. The reasoning made sense to Claire but left her frustrated nonetheless. He lived, she just had to find out where. 

Claire, busy with grueling and disappointing research, also had to contend with an increasingly volatile Brianna. Every day Brianna seemed to grow more ill-tempered in manner, she missed their home in the States, her friends, and most of all Frank. She’d been easy to distract at first, Mrs. Graham spent the first few days after their arrival with a red-headed shadow, telling the young child various stories about fairies as she carried about her chores. Brianna was happy or entertained at the very least, but the longer they stayed the more Brianna began to act out. 

She was by no means the worst behaved child in the world, but she wasn’t herself either. Brianna had become prone to tantrums and bouts of inconsolable crying, during which she would repeatedly cry out for Frank. It broke Claire’s heart to see her daughter in such a state. Claire tried to calm her with the promises of the future, how much Jamie, her real father, would love her and spoil her, the adventures she would have with her cousins and older brother, Fergus; but the hopes held no match for the current reality of a five-year-old.

It was the frantic shout:  _ “I don’t want him, I want Daddy!”  _ That made Claire, for the briefest of seconds, rethink her plan. Maybe this was all happening too fast for Brianna; she obviously wasn’t coping as well as Claire hoped and it wasn’t too late to go back, but the thought of being in Jamie’s arms again propelled her forward.

Today much like yesterday and the day before, Claire was buried in a book while Brianna played quietly with some of the toys Joe had sent. It was close to one o’clock in the afternoon when the front door slammed open, causing Claire and Brianna to jump in their respective places.

“Claire, I found him.” the Reverend shouted, practically running to where she sat on the couch with a document in his hands. 

“What?” Claire asked, surprised by the sudden intrusion and news. 

“I found your highlander,” he repeated, sitting on the couch next to her, “it’s all right here.” 

He handed Claire the paper from his hand, it was a list of names, many of which Claire recognized, Rupert Thomas Alexander MacKenzie being the most notable.

“After the battle at Culloden, a few Jacobite soldiers, all seriously wounded, took refuge in an old house... for two days, then they were all taken out to be shot, but one of them, a Fraser of the Master of Lovat's regiment, escaped execution,” he explained, motioning to the names. 

“There were a lot of Frasers on the field that day,” Claire said. 

“But only five Fraser officers and four of them have their names memorialized on a plaque in the church in Beauly, so... we know for certain that they were killed.”

As her body tensed, Claire asked, “Who was the fifth?” 

“James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser,” the Reverend said with a large smile. 

“Jamie,” Claire whispered, staring down at the names. “But how? I thought there was no record.” 

“Apparently, the British weren’t as careless as we thought, my dear,” he began. “James Fraser was in the capture of Colonel Harold Grey but escaped from the fate of his fellow soldiers. His name was recorded as a capture but he was not among those who were executed, at the very least, he left Culloden Moor alive.”

“Grey…” Claire muttered, settling into the cushions behind her. 

Why was the name familiar? 

Claire couldn’t place it, but she was sure she’d heard the name from somewhere, spoken by someone perhaps even introduced. In the end, it didn’t matter if she couldn’t remember the name because she now had proof that Jamie survived, and that was all that mattered.

“I can’t believe it,” Claire said, closing her eyes and shaking her head, “we found him, we found him.” 

“Yes, it’s quite exciting when the subject of your research makes an appearance, isn’t it? Very thrilling and makes you want to jump right back in! These rare highs make the many lows worth it, don’t they?” the Reverend asked. 

“Very much so,” Claire agreed, opening her eyes to look at the older man. “I can’t tell you how much this means to me– I couldn’t ever thank you enough.” 

“Your thanks aren’t needed,” he smiled, “I’ve quite enjoyed the process, especially for an unknown man. Why you picked James Fraser to research I will never know, but the chase I will never forget.” he reached over and squeezed one of Claire’s hands. 

“Thank you, Reverend,” Claire returned the warm gesture. From the corner of her eye she saw Brianna sitting quietly playing with a doll, a thought struck her, “Do you think Roger might want to come over and play with Brianna? She hasn’t had much interaction with children her own age since we’ve been here, I’m afraid.” Claire asked. 

“Well…” The Reverend paused for a moment to think, “I think he would enjoy that very much! I can bring him over tomorrow if you’d like.”

“Please,” Claire nodded. 

The Reverend made a promise to bring Roger over the following morning and quickly returned home, leaving Claire giddy with anticipation and a list of newly unforgotten names. 

In the following days, it became a repeating occurrence for Roger Wakefield and Fiona Graham to spend time with Brianna, playing with children her age had brightened Brianna’s mood considerably, the trio spent the majority of the day chasing each other and inventing new games. The sound of their laughter made Claire’s heart swell. 

The next finding came a week later, Claire was counting and organizing the old coins she’d been able to purchase when she overheard Fiona request a story from her grandmother, the Dunbonnet. 

The Dunbonnet was a famous outlaw from the seventeen-hundreds, hiding in various caves throughout Scotland and living off the land. It was until Mrs. Graham described the man as having long, red curly tendrils,  _ “Much like yours, Brianna.”  _ that Claire made the connection. Jamie was also known as ‘Red Jamie’, simultaneously feared and wanted by the British, what’s another alias to Jamie’s already long list? 

“Was he ever captured?” Claire asked, leaning against the door frame to the room where the three children sat enchanted by the story Mrs. Graham was telling them. 

“No, he wasn’t.” Mrs. Graham answered, watching Claire over the tops of the children’s heads. “Legend has it that he roamed around, never to be caught. Dependin’ on who ye ask, he still lives.” 

Claire nodded her head and left Mrs. Graham with the children, heading back into the living room she sat on the couch and stared at the piles of books in front of her. She’d come across the Dunbonnet’s name in one of these books, she just couldn’t remember which. 

“Oh, well,” Claire sighed, dragging one of the heavier volumes closer to her. She settled into the cushions and began flipping through the books. Why the Reverend and Frank enjoyed spending all day buried in books Claire would never know, but it was damn well effective.

Turns out, the Dunbonnet was popular just as Mrs. Graham had said, Claire found several mentions of the hooded figure in several books; some described him as a nuisance or a fable while others compared him to Robin Hood. Despite the inconsistencies of what the Dunbonnet did with his time and his overall existence, all of the physical descriptions matched: long, red curly hair matching the color of rust. The first mentions of him, from the older books, stated the Dunbonnet figure and legend started in the prominence of a north-facing tower. 

_ Lallybroch. _

Claire was now sure that the Dunbonnet was in fact Jamie, there were too many similarities for it to be a simple coincidence. Not only had Jamie survived Culloden but he’d made it home to Lallybroch, back to Fraser lands where he could be with his remaining family. In hiding, of course, given the alter ego. Claire wondered if one of the tenants started the rumor to throw the scent off their laird.

Former laird, Clarie reminded herself, for the land technically belonged to Wee Jamie. 

Claire couldn’t imagine what he must have gone through, losing everything and living in the former shadow of what he believed to be a perfect life. 

Well, she would know soon enough, Claire realized, now that she knew where Jamie was, they were almost ready to travel through the stones. All that remained was procuring period-appropriate clothing for herself and Brianna. 

From the boxes Joe had sent, Claire had already packed several of Brianna’s baby photos, mementos of Uncle Lamb, various medicines Joe had snagged from the hospital and twentieth-century identification papers into an old suitcase Mrs. Graham had found in a store window. It was large enough for Claire to pack exactly what they needed yet not too bulky to render it impossible to travel with, blending in for the time.

Satisfied that the research portion of her preparation was done, Claire stacked the books onto the ground and walked down the hall, after a brief check to make sure Brianna was okay, Claire entered the sewing room. 

In the middle of the room stood two mannequins, one Claire’s size and the other Brianna’s. Claire would buy most of the clothes she planned to take back, but Mrs. Graham had insisted on making a dress for each of them from scratch. The dresses were a dull tan, a color to help them blend into the crowds and not fancy enough to give the appearance of wealth. The outer fabric was thick and waterproof, covering the layers of pockets and thin petticoats underneath; the dresses would keep them warm, dry and inconspicuous until they could reach the safety of Lallybroch. They were nearly identical, the hood on Brianna’s coat was long with pull strings so her hair could be completely hidden underneath, it would keep her safe. 

Claire removed the dress from the mannequin and called Brianna into the room so she could try it on.

“Yes?” Brianna asked, walking into the room.

Claire said, handing Brianna the garment, “Try this on for me.”

It took several minutes, but with Claire’s help, Brianna stood in her new outfit as Claire examined it for any impurities. 

“It’s too big,” Brianna said, shifting under the fabric. 

“It’s supposed to be,” Claire told her, lifting the hood over Brianna’s head to see how well it covered her, “you’re going to grow and we won’t be able to make you another one, I want it to last as long as possible.” 

“Why not?” Brianna questioned, “Won’t they have the stuff to make one where we’re going?” 

Claire chuckled, “Yes and no,” she answered honestly, lifting the coats to reach the inner layer. Claire frowned at the zipper trailing down Brianna’s back, remembering the way Mrs. Fitz had stared at the foreign clasps on her bra. Claire wanted the gowns to be as authentic as possible, however, the design worked better with a zipper than laces. They’d just have to be careful with who handled the coats.

“Are we leaving soon? Will Daddy be there?” 

“Hopefully within the next week,” Claire said, circling around to face Brianna, “Frank won’t be there, but Jamie will. Do you remember him?” 

“Yes,” Brianna nodded tentatively. 

Claire had been telling Brianna nonstop about Jamie, hoping to give the girl some sort of familiarity toward him before they met in person. Given her age and lack of understanding, Brianna was excited about the journey. Jamie was still an unknown figure to her, he would simply be there for her when they got to where they were going, but for Claire, he was the destination. One she was eager to reach. 

“All right,” Claire started, placing the gown back in its place on the mannequin as Brianna tugged on her final shoe, “go on and play, and behave for Mrs. Graham. I have some more shopping to do.” 

“Okay!” Brianna shouted, running down the hall to play with her friends. 

It was early in the morning when they set out, the sun was far from rising and the morning dew had yet to settle. Claire watched in the side view mirror as the lights of Mrs. Graham’s home faded into the distance. Claire would miss electricity and indoor plumbing most of all. She’d taken a long, hot shower the night before, relishing as the warm water trailed down her skin knowing it would the last time she ever partook in the luxury. 

Brianna was fast asleep in the backseat, bundled in her newly finished outfit with her bear clutched tightly to her chest. The air in the car was thick with anticipation, Mrs. Graham drove silently as Claire thought to their journey ahead.

She was finally going to Jamie.

Going home. 

They reached the hill of Craigh na Dun sooner than Claire expected. While she was excited to go, she wished they could have stayed longer. Claire had finished preparing two days prior, she had everything they would need to get to Lallybroch and to start a fresh life with Jamie and Fergus, she had no reason to delay any longer. Claire planned on talking to Jamie about going to the colonies, the American Revolution wouldn’t start for another twenty-five years, and by then they should be well-established. It was a good plan, one Claire hoped Jamie would agree to. 

“Wake up, leannan,” Mrs. Graham spoke softly, gently shaking Brianna to wake her. Brianna’s eyes slowly fluttered open, she frowned when she realized she wasn’t in the bedroom she’d fallen asleep in.

“Mama?” she asked, looking for Claire. 

“Right here, lovie,” Claire said, setting the suitcase down on the damp grass and walking where Brianna could see her. “Are you ready to go?” 

Once Brianna nodded, Mrs. Graham pulled her from the car and hoisted Brianna onto her hip, preferring to carry the child rather than the bag. Claire shut the doors behind them and walked at the elder woman’s side up the hill, the suitcase hanging in her hand. It had been tough deciding what to pack, their entire lives were now fit into this one rectangular case. The rest of their belongings were stored away at Mrs. Graham’s for safekeeping. Though she doubted their return, Claire wanted something to come back to should the need arise. 

When the buzzing filled her ears Claire stopped, suddenly fearful that Brianna wouldn’t be able to go through. What would they do then?

Her concerns were alleviated when Brianna covered her ears with her hands, squinting into the darkness.

“It’s okay, Bree,” Claire assured her daughter, running her hand down Brianna’s back. “Do you hear it?” Claire asked Mrs. Graham curiously.

“No, I don’t.” Mrs. Graham answered, giving Claire a sad smile before placing Brianna gently onto the ground. 

“I can’t ever thank you enough,” Claire said, wrapping her arms around Mrs. Graham. Holding the older woman close, Claire felt a sense of camaraderie. She would always have a friend in the future. “I couldn’t have done this without you. Frank–”   
“Will never need to ken,” Mrs. Graham interrupted her. 

“You’ll send the divorce papers?”

“In a month’s time.” 

“Good,” Claire nodded, “good.” 

“I canna go any further,” Mrs. Graham said. “The two of ye will have to go by yerselves, but I’ll stay here until I’m sure ye’re gone.” 

“Are you sure?” Claire asked, nervous to part half-way up the hill.

“Aye,” Mrs. Graham nodded, “the journey is yours– and your daughter’s. Not mine though it breaks my heart to see ye go.” Mrs. Graham reached across the small distance and stroked Claire’s cheek with her thumb. “I wish ye the best of luck in finding yer love, he’s a lucky man.”

“That he is,” Claire sniffled.

“Goodbye, Bree,” Mrs. Graham turned to the silent Brianna, “I think I’m going to miss you most of all, leannan.” She crouched down and wrapped her arms around the smaller figure. “Be good for yer Mam, aye?” 

“I will,” Brianna promised, grabbing Claire’s waiting hand when Mrs. Graham pulled back.

“Go on now, both of ye, get. Ye have a man to find.” 

“Let’s go, darling,” Claire said, squeezing Brianna’s hand, and with a final look and smile, Claire and Brianna ascended the hill, leaving Mrs. Graham alone in the dark.

“You hold onto my hand, do you understand? Don’t let go for a single second.” Claire said, guiding Brianna toward the tallest stone.

“Okay, Mama,” Brianna nodded. 

“I mean it, Bree,” Claire looked down at her daughter.

Brianna looked from her mother to the stones, “Is it going to hurt?”

“It’s going to feel a bit funny,” Claire answered, “but it’s not going to hurt. All right,” Claire took a long breath, “you have Beary tucked under your arm?” 

Brianna nodded, tightening her arm around the stuffed bear.

“On the count of three, you put your hand on the stone,” 

“Okay,” Brianna nodded again.

And with a final breath, “One… two… three.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case I haven't made it clear guys, this is a slow burn, which makes it that much better in my opinion. Jamie and Claire are going to have tons of obstacles to climb over to be together but they will be together, of course.
> 
> Thanks so much for all your comments, reads, and kudos. 
> 
> As always, stay safe out there!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back again with another chapter!
> 
> It wasn't until I'd already established the timeframe of this fic that I realized I'd veered from the canonical timeline. In this fic, the time difference between the future and past is two years instead of three, and the majority of the events will be moved up a few months, for example, Young Ian is born in July of 1952 instead of November. 
> 
> Thank you so much to my beta albatross1013, I couldn't have done this without the constant help and encouragement!

“One… two… three.”

They stepped forward in unison, both their hands stretched in front of them as they made contact with the largest stone. Claire shut her eyes as the wind began to whirl around her and she felt a pulling sensation, like being sucked into a spaceless vacuum. She felt the ground disappear beneath her and the only reason she felt alive was Brianna’s hand squeezing her own tightly. It was over by the time she managed to count to ten in her head, suddenly, the ground was back at her feet and the cold Scottish air was nipping at her skin.

“Brianna? Are you okay?” Claire turned to her daughter, Brianna was standing immobile next to her, staring up at the star-filled sky above in her wonder. “Brianna?” she asked again when Brianna didn’t answer.

“Mama… that was… fun!” Brianna bounced on her feet, dropping Claire’s hand and turning back toward the stone, “Can we do it again?”

Claire dropped the suitcase, uncaring where it landed, and lurched forward to grab Brianna before she could touch the stone and disappear. She pulled Brianna to her by the girl’s hood, whipping Brianna around so they were face to face, her bear falling onto the ground below.

“I told you not to let go of my hand,” Claire scolded.

“When we went on the ride! You didn’t say after!” Brianna protested, stomping her foot into the mud.

“Brianna Ellen,” Claire warned, lowering her voice, hoping to stop the incoming tantrum in its tracks, “stop it this instant. I need you to listen to me, okay? This world… this place is different than what you’re used to. If I tell you to do something, do it, no questions asked. Understand?”

Brianna decided to cooperate, for the time being at least, and let her mother know her position by nodding her head. Claire grabbed her bear of the ground and hurriedly shoved it into the suitcase for safekeeping.

“Good,” Claire took Brianna’s hand once more and lifted the suitcase from the ground. They walked to the edge of the hill, Inverness was only a speck in the dark distance, the city’s lights weren’t as bright or noticeable as they were in the twentieth century. The stones had worked, Claire’s third and hopefully final passage had been successful. They were in the eighteenth century, though Claire was unsure of the exact date; if her calculations were correct and the timeline reliable, they were in 1752. She would have to wait until morning to find out for sure.

Claire’s plan was simple, they would start in Inverness, purchase a horse and a small number of supplies to last them until they reached Lallybroch. Just in case, Mrs. Graham had packed them a day’s worth of rations consisting of PB&J’s, jerky, a pint of water, and a flask full of whiskey. Claire hoped to be at Lallybroch and in Jamie’s arms by the day after tomorrow. They’d purposefully gone through before dawn to allow them a full first day of travel. The sooner they began, the sooner they’d finish.

“Come on, Bree,” Claire tugged lightly on her daughter’s hand to get her moving. They walked in silence, nothing except the sounds of crickets to accompany them. They went slow, the mud beneath their shoes making the already treacherous hill harder to climb down. Claire could see no more than five feet in front of her, the fog and darkness of night obscuring her vision. They had walked on no more than a few feet of flat ground when Brianna’s hand slipped from Claire as she tumbled to the ground.

Claire was expecting a cry or a sniffle, but instead, Brianna screamed.

Claire dropped the suitcase and bent to the ground, trying to offer her daughter comfort as well as the reason for her screams. Brianna looked unharmed, there were no obvious signs of blood and she wasn’t in distress. It took a few seconds before Claire realized Brianna wasn’t screaming in pain but terror.

“Brianna, what happened?” Claire yelled, trying to get through Brianna’s continued screams. Fearful of attracting unwanted attention, Claire clamped her hand around Brianna’s mouth, the screams turning into whimpers. “Bree? I need you to calm down, why are you screaming?”

Brianna simply pointed behind Claire, the source of her fear and the reason for her tumble, was the unmistakable white of bone protruding from a bush.

Claire dropped her hand from Brianna’s mouth and moved forward, pushing away the green to reveal a full skeleton underneath, “Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ,” Claire cursed, eyeing the scene before her. The skeleton was complete, resting just as the person had died, a highland warrior based on the destroyed kilt covering the lower half. Claire couldn’t designate which clan this man had belonged to, knowing just enough to know he wasn’t a MacKenzie or Fraser, the tartan’s pattern was wrong.

In all the scenarios Claire had imagined, this was not one of them. Brianna’s first look at her new life was not supposed to be a dead warrior, she would have preferred some beautiful flower, or ideally, Jamie’s face would have been the first thing associated, but they were in a world full of violence and short life spans. This skeleton was simply a reminder as to why Jamie sent her and their unborn daughter away.

“Mama?” Bree sniffled, dragging Claire’s thoughts to the present.

“It’s all right, you’re okay.”

Claire began to turn toward Brianna, ready to whisk her away, when a glint of silver caught her eye. She brushed away the dirt to reveal a sgian dubh settled next to the dead man’s lower right leg. Claire grabbed the dagger from the ground, being careful not to disturb the skeleton, with the dagger free Claire wiped the blade on her coat. The blade’s weight was familiar in her grip, similar to the one Jamie had given her so many years ago.

Frank had confiscated hers while she had still been recovering in hospital, claiming there was no need for her to own such a weapon. He’d taken it and Claire never saw it again. She assumed he had kept it hidden or donated it to one of his scholar friends. Nonetheless, Claire never forgot how to yield the knife and easily slipped the six-inch blade in her stocking. At least now, she wouldn’t have to buy one.

Claire took Brianna’s hand and the suitcase and walked away from the bush, already willing her mind to forget the scene.

They made it to Inverness by dawn, the sun was just making itself known on the horizon as they walked down the dirt road, Claire pulled Brianna’s hood up as soon as they entered the city’s radius. The residents were just beginning to wake; laborers toiled in the streets, lifting and pulling carts, herding animals while owners began opening their shops. The smell of freshly made bannocks hung in the air making Claire’s stomach growl, Brianna’s too as she stared at everything in fascination, her nose sniffing the air.

Claire approached the bakery, trading a few coins for a warm, round freshly baked bannock wrapped in cloth. They stepped away from the bakery and Claire tore off a piece of the bread, handing it to Brianna who scarfed it down hungrily.

“Did you like that?”

“Yes! Can I have another?” Brianna asked, standing on the tip of her toes to get closer.

“Of course,” Claire handed her another piece, “they taste even better with honey and butter. Your Aunt Jenny makes a wonderful jam, it’s absolutely delicious,”

Brianna looked up in confusion at the word “aunt”, Claire had only given the girl a brief rundown of the family outside of Jamie and Fergus. Brianna would soon be surrounded by a large family who loved her, it made Claire’s heart swell with the thought. Frank had been an amazing father and an adequate husband, Brianna was always taken care of and given what she needed. However, through the first few years of Brianna’s life she had no family outside of Claire and Frank, the Beauchamps were dead and the Randalls in England, depriving Brianna of the large family she deserved. The Fraser/Murrays were the epitome of a close familial relationship, and even the MacKenzies despite their flaws kept family close to their hearts. 

After all these years, Brianna would finally have the large, loving family she deserved. Claire was thankful that Brianna would get to experience such a feeling.

The bannock was all but devoured by the time Claire had managed to find a stable willing to sell a horse. It was a beast, similar in look to Donas but much more friendly with light grey hair. Claire walked around its stall, doing her best to imitate Jamie’s inspection of the creatures. She learned from him that a horse’s eyes had to be clear and alert, weight needed to be placed evenly amongst all their legs, have a shiny coat with a healthy appetite and thirst. 

“Can you lift its hooves, please? I want to look at the shoe.” Claire said.

The stable boy did as she asked, carefully lifting the front right leg for Claire to expect. The bottom of its hoof was unscathed, lacking the warning signs of cuts, bumps, or pustules. Satisfied with her examination, she let the stable boy drop the hoof and ran her hand along the back of the horse. 

“I’ll take him,” she said with a smile.

It was mid-morning by the time Claire and Brianna rode slowly out of town, having purchased another bannock due to Brianna’s delight and a few other supplies, they were ready for the journey. Brianna was situated in front of Claire with their suitcase tied securely to the saddlebag the stable had graciously provided. Claire hadn’t ridden a horse in years, Brianna never, so they rode slowly, bouncing with the clip-clop of the horse’s hooves. It would take them longer to get to Lallybroch this way but Claire didn’t mind too much, preferring safety over speed.

Claire permitted Brianna to let down her hood, the sun bounced off Brianna’s red hair, almost blinding Claire with the red glow. They stuck to the side of the road, getting out of the way of travelers hurrying toward their destination, Claire was thankful and a tad curious as to why they hadn’t come across a single redcoat so far. From what the Reverend told her, they should be all over the place.

“Can we name him Ash?” Brianna asked, looking back at Claire.

“What?”

“The horse,” Brianna said, “can we name him Ash? He needs a name.”

Claire thought for a moment, this horse was the closest Brianna had ever had to having a pet, it made sense she would want to name it.

“Ash sounds lovely,” Claire smiled down at Brianna who bounced with glee. “You’re going to love the farm, Bree, your aunt and uncle have lots of animals! Horses, dogs, pigs, and sheep, I think there was even a cat.” 

“A dog?” Brianna asked hopefully. “Can I get one?”

“We’ll have to talk to your father, aunt, and uncle about that but I don’t see why not.” Claire was sure they would let the girl get one, however, Claire had no idea how they would even get a dog.

“So Daddy is meeting us there! How come he didn’t travel with us?”

“Jamie, Bree, Jamie is going to be there, your–”

“Real daddy,” Brianna finished, interrupting Claire.

Claire nodded, “I know this is all confusing, darling, but we’re better off here, trust me.”

“I trust you, Mama,” Claire barely heard Brianna mumble before the young girl rested her head back against Claire’s chest and fell silent.

Despite their slow speed, they were making great progress. They stopped periodically to allow the horse to graze and drink water, allowing Claire and Brianna to stretch their legs. By nightfall, Claire estimated that they were a third of the way to Lallybroch, passing the road to Beauly many hours before. She didn’t know their exact location, she just knew up north was Leoch, south was Glasglow, and west was Lallybroch.

Claire tied Ash to a tree, helping Brianna down from the horse before setting up camp for the night. Claire had smartly brought matches with her but decided to light the fire without them, the matches would only last so long. She found two rocks for the purpose and showed Brianna how to move them together, creating a spark that would lead to a roaring fire.

“Now, you try,” Claire said, handing Brianna the rocks once the fire was lit. Brianna did her best, rubbing the rocks together as Claire had, it took several minutes and strikes, but eventually, a spark made Brianna’s face break out into a smile.

“Look, Mama! I did it.”

“Yes, you did, good job Bree.”

“Can we eat now?” Brianna asked, settling down next to the fire for warmth.

“Of course,” Claire said, pulling out the wrapped sandwiches and pieces of jerky. They conversed quietly, Brianna doing most of the talking, repeating the sights she had seen during their first day, the many horses having been her favorite. While Brianna talked, Claire focused on keeping the fire alive but low. They weren’t on the main road, a little ways from it, but Claire was sure their fire would stand out against the surrounding darkness, she had no desire to attract attention from anybody.

Brianna slept peacefully through the night, curling into Claire’s side with her head resting on her mother’s stomach. Claire, on the other hand, was merely able to doze for no more than an hour, being awoken by the once-familiar sounds around them. Ash stayed calm and steady, telling Claire that there was no immediate danger nearby, remembering how Jamie could tell the danger level by the way a horse acted. The small reassurance didn’t snuff her fears, however, and Claire found herself waking with any small sound: the rustling of leaves, hooting of owls, and howling of wolves.

Every once in a while Claire would hear voices in the distance and the neighs of horses of passing travelers on the main road, making her body tense with fear and suspicion until they could no longer be heard. 

They set out at daybreak, keeping the same pace as the day before to reach Lallybroch the next day. Claire once again stayed silent as Brianna talked away, pointing out every pretty flower or animal she’d never seen before. It was around noon when they had their first encounter with a redcoat.

Claire noticed Ash move nervously, whipping his head around to try and see whatever noise he’d picked up, Brianna had to grip the reins to keep from sliding off. Soon, Caire heard it too, the shouting of a man and the galloping of a horse coming from behind. She tightened Brianna’s hood over her hair just as the man passed and stopped in front of them, essentially blockading them.

“Whoa, whoa,” Claire said to Ash, gently pulling back the reins to get him to stop. “What can I do for you, soldier?” Claire asked the man with a smile, doing her best to pull Brianna closer without making it noticeable.

The redcoat pulled off his tricorn hat, holding it to his chest and bowing his head at them, his black hair perfectly flattened from the cap.

“The question, my Lady, is what I can do for you. What is a fine English woman and child doing by themselves in the middle of hostile territory?” he asked.

Hostile?

Claire frowned, this man was the first and only person to have interacted with them thus far.

She quickly morphed her frown into a false look of admiration, “Why, I’m just seeing what brave men such as yourself have managed to do with savages such as Scots. I’ve heard the rumors, you know, turning them back toward the rightful King and God.”

He seemed appeased by her answer, lifting his hat to rest on his head once more with a smile, “It truly is magnificent,” he began, “and so well worth the time. All of the land reunited under the one true King, why, it warms my heart.”

“And mine,” Claire added.

“Mmm, yes,” he said with a single nod, “but that still doesn’t explain why you’re alone with no escort.”

“Oh, um,” Claire bit her lip, trying to quickly come up with an answer.

“You know,” Brianna began before Claire could stop her, “you’d travel much faster by car, you should get one! I like horses but they’re so slow.”

Claire felt her pulse quicken.

“Car?” the man questioned, staring at Brianna.

“Yes! A car–”

Claire covered Brianna’s mouth with her hand before she could say another word.

“Don’t mind her, soldier, she’s delirious with fever,” Claire explained.

“Fever, you say?” the soldier leaned closer to get a better look at Brianna, “She does look a bit ill.” his eyes narrowed.

“Yes, I thought the fresh countryside air would do her some good as well as show her the hardworking–”

“I shall escort you to the nearest outpost, there’s one not far from here,” he said matter-of-factly, resting back onto his horse, “we’ll be there in no time and your daughter can get the care she deserves.”

“Really, there’s no need,” Claire said, trying to think of an excuse to get him to leave.

Just then, as ill-fated as their luck was, a strand of Brianna’s hair escaped its confines, blowing in the summer breeze. The soldier noticed, leaning forward once more as if trying to confirm his unspoken conclusion.

“She’s contagious!” Claire shouted, the man lurching back as a result. “Highly contagious, in fact, I think it’s the beginning stages of the pox. We were kicked out of our lodgings, you see,”

“My word… you poor girl,” he gave Brianna a look of pity, “And what of yourself, Madam?”

“I’m her mother, is it not my job to look after her?”

“Where’s her father? Your husband?”

“Well, he’s,” Claire motioned down to Brianna, “dead,” she spoke softly.

“Ah, yes,” he nodded in understanding, “I see, no need to panic the child. Well, I simply can’t take you to the outpost in such circumstances, I’m afraid.”

“Of course not,” Claire agreed.

The man nodded, again, taking the reins of his horse in hand, he bid them farewell.

Claire watched as the redcoat disappeared down the road, going in the same direction as she was planning. Claire decided it was no longer safe to travel on the main road, the man would surely recognize them if they passed and he was definitely going to spread the word of a pox case. Claire gently veered Ash to the right, off the main road, and through the bushes and trees. They stopped less frequently, Claire hoped to make it to Lallybroch sooner, somewhere safe and protected from any more British soldiers.

Claire slept restlessly again that night, not bothering to keep the fire Brianna had started lit. The next morning, they set off a bit later than Claire would have liked, Brianna refused to get up and back on the horse. It took coaxing, and promises of more bannocks to get Brianna moving.

Within a few hours, Claire resigned herself to the fact that they were lost. They were moving west, Claire was assured by her compass, but their exact location and proximity to Lallybroch was unknown. Their stomachs grumbled, Claire unwisely had not rationed their food, Brianna had eaten the last of their provisions for lunch the day before. Claire forced Brianna to drink large amounts of water while she drank whiskey, hoping the liquids would trick their stomachs thinking they were full.

“Mama, what was that?” Brianna asked, stopping in their tracks. Claire held Ash steady, hoping to hear what Brianna was talking about. “You hear it?” Brianna looked at Claire.

“I don’t…” Claire trailed off, trying to focus on their surroundings. It took a few minutes before I realized what Brianna was talking about; voices, shouting voices could be heard close by.

Claire frowned, why did the voices sound familiar?

“Bree, stay here,” Claire instructed, tying Ash to a tree and motioning for Brianna to stand close to him. “I’m going to be right back, don’t move from this spot until I come and get you.”

Claire left Brianna and Ash alone in the brush, slowly walking towards the shouting.

“Blood money!” A male voice shouted, followed by a series of grunts.

“Ye gave me no choice, brother. And I’ll never forgive you. Never!” This time it was a woman.

Claire watched, hidden by the plants, as two redcoats wrestled a large man into a waiting cart. He fought them, twisting his massive body, trying to get away but achieving nothing. It wasn’t until Claire caught sight of the man’s eyes that all the pieces fell together.

“Jamie?” she whispered, stepping out of her hiding place when the redcoats disappeared. Sure enough, Jamie, her Jamie, was encased behind steel bars. “Jamie!” she said louder, hoping to get his attention without attracting the guards.

“What?” he grunted, stopping his thrashing long enough to peer through his cage. “Sassenach?” he asked in surprise, his eyes widening.

Before she could say another word, the cart jerked to life, and with it Jamie.

“Sassenach!” he yelled, thrashing about once more, “Let me go! No, Claire!”

She watched helplessly as they pulled him away, she could still hear his cries despite having disappeared from view. Claire took a few steps forward, unsure of what to do next, this was not how their reunion was supposed to go. Her mind fogged with the possibilities of his capture.

Where were they taking him? What was going to happen?

She was so lost in thought that Claire didn’t hear the upcoming footsteps from behind and the subsequent gasp.

“Claire?”

Claire turned slowly, only to find the shocked face of her sister-in-law, Jenny Fraser Murray, standing a few feet away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this was my plan all along and exactly what I meant regarding a slow burn, nothing is ever easy for our favorite couple– and it won't be for some time. I'm sure you can all guess exactly where Jamie is going but we'll cover it next chapter regardless. Fear not, however, there will be some light fluff next chapter to brighten up the darkened mood. 
> 
> Thanks for reading everyone, I really appreciate it and I'm looking forward to seeing what you guys think. 
> 
> As always, be safe and stay healthy.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to my beta albatross1013 for the advice and encouragement while writing this as well as pointing out that the Ian's–senior and young– had brown hair... I can't be the only one who thought they were redheads, right? 
> 
> This chapter is a bit dialogue heavy, sorry, I tried to space it out so it doesn't drag on too long, the next chapter will be much better!

“Jenny?” Claire asked, meeting Jenny’s gaze. Despite her shaking hands, Claire felt her body go numb, her respiration increased and the only sound she could hear was her heart pounding in her ears. She was going into shock, her mind dimly realized.

Jenny seemed to be in a similar state, unmoving except for the flash of expressions across her face, alternating between confusion, relief, regret, and anger. They stared at each other quietly, neither mentally nor emotionally in a place to break the uneasy space that divided them.

Jenny looked exactly as Claire remembered her, dark blue eyes furrowed with her long brown hair curled into a bun on the top of her head. The beginnings of wrinkles could be seen on her otherwise pristine forehead, the result of having her brother as a wanted criminal, no doubt. Her breasts were heavy with what Claire assumed to be milk, Claire remembered finding the birth record of a new baby, the child would be no more than a month old.

Jenny crossed her arms, her face settling into resolution, “Ye must be a ghost to brave comin’ back here.”

“What?” Claire responded, her voice shaky.

“Ye heard what I said,” Jenny snapped, “only a ghost would be foolish enough to back come here after all this time.”

Jenny’s words flew over Claire’s head, her mind kicking into gear once more as her brain finally processed Jamie’s arrest. Claire turned, ignoring the snort from Jenny’s mouth as she stared down the path that the redcoats had taken Jamie.

“Where are they taking him?”

“I dinna–”

“Jamie, Jenny!” Claire yelled, whipping around to face Jenny. “The redcoats took him, where are they going? Why the hell would anyone turn him in the first place? He’s their laird, your brother.”

“Exactly, my brother, dinna go blabbin’ about things ye canna understand,” Jenny said, poking her chest, “ye’ve no matters here anymore. What happens to Jamie is none of yer concern.”

“He’s my husband!”

“No!” Jenny shouted, her voice easily loud enough to overpower Claire’s. “He stopped bein’ yer husband when we grieved ye,'' Jenny's body began to shake with emotion, “ye’re nothin’ more than a ghost now, and as I said, we’ve no room for ghosts at Lallybroch. Ye’re no’ welcome here anymore.”

“Jenny…” Claire began, pausing to try and think of the right thing to say. It was clear Jenny was upset, whether it was because of her disappearance or sudden arrival Claire didn’t know. They didn’t have the time to find out, however, Jamie was being carted off further and further away the more they just stood around and argued. If they had any hope of rescuing Jamie and reuniting him with his family they had to move fast, but Claire needed help.

Help from the Murray’s would only come in tandem with Jenny’s blessing and permission.

“I know I have a lot to explain and I promise I will but you have to tell me what happened with Jamie, I have to know if he’s going to be all right.”

Claire watched as for the briefest of seconds Jenny’s face fell into concern, she was just as worried about Jamie as Claire, that much was clear, but in true Fraser fashion, she refused to budge. Locking her feet into the ground, unwilling to waver from the position she’d already set; Jenny was as stubborn as ever, just like her brother and niece.

“Ye’re no welcome here,” Jenny said, her voice slow, trying to hide the emotions threatening to barrel out, “I’m no’ goin’ to say it again. Go away and dinna come back, there’s nothin’ ye can do about it anyway.”

“Surely you don’t believe that?” Claire asked, dumbfounded by Jenny’s statement, the old Jenny would have never given up on her brother, not too long they had ridden into the night in search of Jamie but now… something was off and Claire couldn’t pinpoint what. “Jenny–” Claire began.

A rustling came from the side of the road, the women broke their stand-off to turn towards the noise, only to see bright red hair emerge from the green bushes.

“Mama!” Bree yelled, beginning to walk toward Claire but stopped when she noticed Jenny. “Mama…” Bree’s voice was softer, questioning with hints of curiosity and fear.

“Mama?” Jenny looked from Bree to Claire, “Ye’ve got to be kiddin’ me.”

“Perhaps we should go inside, aye? Seems we have a lot to speak of.”

They turned once more, this time in the opposite direction as Ian stood directly parallel from Bree, the four of them forming a cross in the road. No one moved, Ian and Jenny shared looks of a silent argument while Bree looked to Claire for assurance and comfort. Claire wanted nothing more than to rush forward and trap Brianna in a hug, however, she didn’t move a muscle, afraid of setting Jenny off again.

It was Ian who moved first, hobbling slowly across the road to Bree, kneeling in front of her and giving her the biggest smile.

“Hello, little one,” his voice was soft, “I’m guessin’ I’m yer Uncle Ian. Am I no’?” he addressed Claire at the end of his sentence, looking at her for confirmation which Claire gave without hesitation. “What’s yer name, lass?”

“Brianna Ellen,” Brianna answered, even though Jenny wasn’t in her direct sight Claire could see Jenny’s shoulders stiffen at Brianna’s name.

“Brianna Ellen,” Ian repeated, his Scottish tongue rolling the R, making it more pronounced. “A bonnie name for a bonnie wee lass.”

“I’m not wee… are you really my uncle?” Brianna asked, stepping forward. No longer shy, she reached a small hand towards the thin brown locks covering Ian’s dirty forehead.

“I am,” Ian nodded, “and that’s yer Auntie,” he motioned to his wife behind him who had gone completely still and quiet.

Brianna leaned around Ian to look at Jenny, giving her a once-over before returning her attention to her uncle, “Do you need any help?” Brianna asked, watching Ian as he began to stand, not waiting for an answer, Bree grabbed Ian by his elbow and did her best to raise him from the ground. In the end, her help did nothing, her tiny body no match for Ian’s but he smiled and thanked her nonetheless. Ian grasped Brianna’s hand, propelling the two women forward as he led Brianna through the gates of Lallybroch for the first time.

“Is it just the two of you?” Ian asked Claire.

“Yes, well, no, our horse is tied through the bushes,” Claire answered, walking slowly behind Ian and Brianna.

“Rabbie!” Ian yelled.

Seconds later, a teenage boy ran forward, long brown hair tied behind his head.

“Rabbie McNabb?” Claire looked from the boy to Ian.

“Aye, the very one,” Ian nodded.

“Yes, Mister Murray?” Rabbie asked.

Claire stood silent as Ian told the boy to get Ash and bring him to the paddock, instructing that the horse be fed and watered.

The exterior of the estate hadn’t changed, Claire noticed as she surveyed the scene before her.

The yard was still full of animals lazing around in their pens, the stone frame of the house was cracked from age and weather erosion, the garden was weeded and growing beautifully. Two dogs slept peacefully on the stairs to the house, a perfect recreation of the scene Claire was created with on her first visit. It was almost as if nothing had changed, Claire would have believed so if it wasn’t for the specks of grey in Ian and Jenny’s hair.

“Fergus?” Claire turned to Ian when she didn’t immediately notice her son amongst the gaggle of teenagers by the edge of the yard. She didn’t recognize any of the children, she assumed one of them to be Wee Jamie but the others couldn’t possibly identify.

“He’s out in the field,” Ian said, “we had to send him out when the guards came. He would have tried to stop them, would no’ have ended well, if ye ken what I mean. Oh, Claire, he’ll be so happy to see ye.” Ian gave her a smile before leading them all inside into the dining room.

Similar to the exterior the interior had remained the same, paintings adorned the walls, covering the wallpaper beneath, the same furniture in the same place with the tiny decorative pieces unmoved.

Brianna sat into the chair Ian pulled out for her before calling Mary– the cook Claire assumed –to retrieve food and drink. Claire took the seat next to Brianna as Ian sat across from them, Claire felt hurt yet unsurprised when Jenny sat as far from them as she could.

Ian thanked Mary and dismissed her, instructing the woman to fetch Fergus and then make herself scarce, they were to remain undisturbed until he said otherwise. While the adults stared at each other in awkward silence, Brianna dug into the plate that had been placed before her.

“She’s quite the appetite, aye?” Ian said, “Jamie was the same at her age, couldna get enough food into his body, he was always hungry.”

“I can barely keep up with her sometimes,” Claire admitted with a smile, thankful that Ian had broken the uneasy silence. Claire didn’t think she could take much more of the daggers Jenny was giving her when she wasn’t staring at Bree, that is.

It wasn’t long before the doors to the living room swung open, shutting just as quick when the boy was in the room.

“Milady!” Fergus said, a smile spreading across his face. He rushed forward just as Claire jumped from her chair, wrapping her arms around him and hugging him to her chest.

“Fergus, oh, Fergus.” Claire cried happily, burying her nose into the mop of curls on his head.

“I thought I’d never see you again, I thought… well, I guess I don’t know what I thought,” Fergus said.

“Let me look at you,” Claire told him, gently pushing him to arm's length to take in his appearance. He was no longer the short, scraggly boy she had left but a tall, muscled teenager, practically a man, Claire noted. His hair was still wild, his curls hanging down his forehead to cover his beautiful hazel eyes. “My God, look at you, all grown up.” Claire smiled, moving her hand to cup his cheek lovingly. Her eyes trailed down his form once more, almost as if to reassure herself that he was in fact standing before her, her breath hitched when she noticed how the flesh of his left arm turned to a rounded stump.

“I’ll explain later, I don’t even notice it anymore,” he promised with a smile noticing where her eyes had landed, “I can’t believe you’re back, milady, milord is going to be thrilled…” he trailed off, his smile dropping to a frown as he thought of Jamie.

“I know,” Claire said, using her index finger to lift his chin, recovering from her stupor, “we’ll get him back, don’t worry, we always do, don’t we?”

“Oui,” Fergus nodded in agreement.

“In the meantime, Fergus,” Claire wrapped her arm around Fergus’ shoulder and moved him to stand next to Brianna. “This is Brianna, your, well, your sister.”

Fergus’ breath hitched, looking from Brianna to Claire and back again in surprise, “My sister,” he whispered.

“Hello!” Brianna greeted between bites of the potato she was clutching in her hand.

“Here, mon petite,” Fergus said, breaking away from Claire’s hold to sit next to Brianna. He took the potato from Brianna’s grasp and cut it into smaller pieces for her on the table, handing them back to her as he cut each section. “It’s easier to eat this way.”

Claire smiled at them, it was clear that they would get along perfectly, Claire was thankful. She was worried about how Brianna might react to him, suddenly no longer an only child, but Brianna surprised Claire by allowing Fergus to help her, usually, Brianna wouldn’t accept help from anyone who wasn’t her mother or Frank.

“Weel, are you goin’ to stand around all day or tell us whatever ye’ve come to say?” Jenny asked, ripping Claire’s attention from her children.

“Right,” Claire nodded, sitting back down in her chair, “I–I thought Jamie died at Culloden. He was prepared–we prepared for it– for him to go down with his men. We found out the same day that I was pregnant with Bree so he sent me away. He said it would be safer for me and for our child to be as far from Scotland as we could, given his status as an outlaw, you know?” Claire began to explain. She’d been practicing their story, their lie, since Raymond had visited. Claire knew they would have to have an explanation for her absence, she’d mastered it on their journey to Lallybroch, able to recite it without hesitation. 

“I’ll stop ye right there,” Jenny said, interrupting Claire, “my brother loved ye so and I ken if he kent ye were with child again he would never have sent ye away. He would have sent ye here.”

“Jenny, let her finish,” Ian said to his wife, Jenny snorted in response, waving her hand for Claire to continue.

Claire shook her head, pleading with her eyes for Jenny to understand, “I boarded a ship to the Colonies, remarried soon after I arrived– it was a matter of survival– you have to believe me. I did what I had to do to survive, for myself and Bree, and when he died,” Claire looked at Bree as she spoke, breathing out a sigh of relief when Brianna didn’t react to her words, “I decided that Bree had to know, deserved to know about Jamie so we came back, except I didn’t find a grave, I heard rumors about the Dunbonnet and I just knew it was him.”

Ian nodded in approval, the story sitting well with him as a good enough explanation, Jenny, on the other hand, didn’t look convinced.

“I hear... truth in what ye’re sayin’ but I can see in yer eyes, there’s somethin’ yer keepin’ from me. Yer no tellin’ the whole truth, part of what yer sayin’ is a lie, and I’m no’ interested in hearin’ such things.” Jenny said, jabbing her finger on the table.

“My mama is not lying!” Brianna suddenly shouted, surprising all three adults and Fergus who looked at her in response. “We lived in Boston with my daddy but then we went on a ride, through some stones, and came here.”

“What in the devil is she talkin’ about?” Jenny asked, frowning at Brianna.

“Bree,” Claire sighed, hoping to catch her daughter’s attention which was stuck firmly on Jenny.

“Weel then, care to try again?” Jenny turned back to Claire.

Claire looked to Ian for support but Brianna’s outburst seemed to drain him of whatever faith he’d placed in her, his face stoic and unreadable.

“You won’t believe me,” Claire said, void of hope, it had been a miracle that Jamie had believed her in the first place. He’d wanted it kept hidden from Jenny and Ian, afraid they wouldn’t understand, but if Claire could make the bullheaded Murtagh believe, then she could try with her in-laws.

“I’m from the future, I was born in 1918 and in 1946 I was on holiday with my husband, Frank, and when I visited the standing stones at Craigh na Dun I was transported here, two hundred years in the past. I don’t know why, I don’t know how but I was, and I’m grateful for it. I met so many people, met Jamie because of it, I met all of you.”

“Have ye lost yer mind?” Jenny asked, shaking her head at Claire, “That’s all nonsense!”

“You asked for the truth and I’m giving it to you!” Claire shouted, “I knew what would happen at Culloden, the failed Jacobite uprising, and that’s why we went to Paris– to stop it but we failed. I went back because it was safer for me and the baby, if I had known he would live… I wouldn’t have gone, but at the time it was the only choice I had.”

“How did ye ken to come back?” Ian asked, his voice at a whisper.

“I found out Jamie was alive and for the first time in years I felt hope, true hope, and I just knew I had to come back. I want us to be a family, all four of us, Jamie and I together with Brianna and Fergus. Don’t we deserve that chance?”

“How do we ken this isn’t a lie?”

“Look me in my eyes, Jenny, you said you could tell I was lying before, am I lying now?” Claire made eye contact with Jenny, leaning as far as the table would allow so Jenny could see her eyes, “I’m from the future.” Claire said slowly.

Jenny took a deep breath, holding eye contact with Claire for several seconds before she closed her eyes and relaxed back into the chair.

“I… I think I believe ye,” Jenny admitted, “God, I’m as insane as ye!”

“How else do you think I knew to grow potatoes?” Claire gave her a sad smile, “ I knew what would happen and how it would help.”

“Aye, and it did, saved us for many winters,” Ian confirmed.

“Now that you believe me,” Claire squared her shoulders, “why don’t you tell me what happened to Jamie?”

Jenny opened her mouth several times, unsure of how to string together an explanation of what had happened, in the end, it took two hours for Jenny to finish.

Jamie had arrived at Lallybroch almost a week after Culloden, broken and scarred– emotionally and physically– but alive, nonetheless. Jenny did her best to heal his physical wounds, cleaning them with alcohol as she’d seen Claire do and wrapped them with fresh linens. Her work wasn’t perfect but he lived, he got better and soon enough Jamie was moving around the estate.

At first, he lived with them inside the house, he and Fergus spent most of their nights together, taking solace in the other, until the raids by redcoats began. They would show up with enough warning for Jamie to hide but left a trail of destruction in their wake, tearing apart the house and oftentimes arresting Ian for made-up charges. Eventually, Jamie couldn’t take it anymore, resigning himself to live as a hermit in the caves nearby. He would forge for food, hunt game which he would bring back to the farm and was never gone for long, around to see the birth of his nephew and the loss of Fergus’ hand.

Claire had to shut her eyes when Jenny talked about Fergus’ scuffle with the redcoats, doing her best to keep her face neutral and the emotions at bay. Fergus, who was still cutting Brianna’s food, tensed when Jenny began, relaxing almost immediately when Jenny moved on to her and Jamie’s plan. They need money, desperately, and it was Jamie’s idea to use the price on his head to fund the farm. It was arranged that Jenny would call the guard, telling them of Jamie’s impending arrival and he would be arrested; Jenny claimed the reward money before someone else could.

. Throughout Jenny’s explanation, Ian had been refilling their drams with sorely needed whisky, but by the time Jenny finished talking Claire was buzzed from the alcohol and the wave of knowledge.

“Now, ye ken everythin',” Jenny finished, leaning back in her chair with a sigh, “they’ve taken him away. I dinna think… dinna ken if there’s anythin’ we can do about it.”

Ian nodded grimly, “They took him to Ardsmuir most like, at least they’re no longer hangin’ Jacobite soldiers, he’ll probably get a hefty sentence though given his reputation and position to Prince Charlie.”

“There’s something we can do, there’s always something we can do, I just can’t think straight right now,” Claire said, rubbing her temples to try and ward off the impending headache.

“Aye, it’s been a night,” Ian said, draining the last of his dram before standing from the table, “I’ve had Mary make up the laird’s room for ye, I ken Wee Jamie is laird now but I’d rather ye have it. Jamie stayed in it a bit while he healed, we never moved back in when he could no longer stay. I think it’s only right that ye and the bairn stay there.”

For the first time that night, Jenny nodded in agreement with her husband.

“Thank you,” Claire smiled at Ian, standing from the chair and looking expectantly at Fergus, “Fergus? Would you like to stay with us?”

“No, I, uh, I have my own room, milady,” Fergus seemed to look everywhere except Claire. “Good night, mon petite,” Fergus said to Brianna, leaning down to place a kiss on her red hair, “I’ll see ye tomorrow. Auntie, Uncle,” he gave Ian and Jenny a bow before rushing from the room.

“Good night!” Brianna called after him followed by a large yawn.

Claire watched him leave, confused as to why he was leaving in such a hurry, saying goodbye to everyone but her.

“He needs time,” Jenny supplied.

“I suppose…” Claire sighed.

Ian led them to their room, their suitcase waiting for them at the edge of the bed, Ian wished them good night before leaving and closing the door behind him. The room was practically just as Claire and Jamie had left it before Culloden, her trunk of dresses from Paris was in the corner while her small number of cosmetics rested on the vanity.

Claire helped Brianna dress into the shift left on the bed, an old one of Maggie’s, Claire assumed. The gown was slightly too big for Brianna, the hem of the dress dangled at her ankles, hanging loosely around her slim frame. Brianna was asleep the moment she was tucked under the blankets.

Claire stared at the space above her as she laid in bed, overwhelmed with a sense of belonging and loss. They were finally home but Jamie wasn’t with them, he was either already at the prison or spending the night in his mobile cell. Wherever he was, Claire hoped he was comforted with the knowledge that she was here, and she would soon be coming for him.

He had to know that, right?

Claire felt conflicted, the thought of Jenny turning Jamie in made her stomach churn, even though Jenny made it quite clear it was all Jamie’s idea, she had been squarely against it. However, at the same time, Claire understood Jenny’s situation. Claire had practically done the same thing, acting out a plan set forth by Jamie so what little he could do for his family could be done. Jamie had been right, no matter how reluctant Claire was to admit, Brianna had had a wonderful life in the future with Frank as her father. 

Frank may have been a terrible husband, though it wasn’t all his fault, he was an amazing father to Brianna. Doting on her since the moment she’d been born, his perfect little angel, Brianna had everything she could possibly need or want since Frank was rarely able to tell his princess no– a source of many of their arguments. Despite the luxuries of the future and somewhat idealistic lives they led, Claire had never felt properly in place, but now, two hundred years in the past Claire felt content. She felt home. She hoped that soon, Brianna would feel the same.

For the first time in weeks, Claire slept all through the night, peacefully.

  
  
  



End file.
